On depression…. 

I think it is part of our condition that we are wired to experience sadness, and sometimes the sadness feels pretty deep and penetrating.  I believe that it is important and healthy for us to cry when we need a good cry. 

I also believe life is a journey of learning to manage my own states.  I learned that I am responsible for the emotional outcomes I create.  I know what can lead to the happiness, excitement, and aliveness I most enjoy feeling.  To start, I can turn inward and ask myself what I need right now, or what I most wish to hear, or what would make me feel better. 

The trick is to then commit to the practices that lead to those states I’d like to feel in an ongoing way, despite looking silly or risking getting rejected (which is one of our biggest fears because we fear being left alone).  One such practice is getting lots of hugs.  I know it sounds silly but most of us are touch deprived, and when you get enough hugs, you feel better. 

Another is getting enough sleep, and another is drinking enough water, for how can our brain operate well if it is dehydrated (and we are 80% water)?  Alongside this is learning to eat foods that serve me, and saying no to those that don’t. 

Another is decluttering and giving charity–let other’s use what you’re no longer using. 

And yet another is being honest & not hiding–this sometimes means sharing your true feelings, your secrets, the things you’re afraid of, and the big dreams you’re afraid you’ll fail to attain.  Following this comes working to attain those big dreams (all you have to do is visualize the outcome and take baby steps daily). 

Another is helping friends, because life isn’t only about you & you’re here to help others too.

And another is hearing that you’re okay from others and hearing that you’re loved, cherished, valued, and appreciated–and when these moments come, letting the love you’re feeling sink in and penetrate–even when it feels a little outside of your comfort zone.  By the way, if you’re not receiving this affirmation, allow yourself to figure out how you most like to receive it (through word, touch, gift, or compansionship)–and then asking for what you want in the form you want–the worst that can happen is that someone says “no” & you’re no worse for the wear, as you didn’t have what you wanted before you asked anyway!

Another is learning to affirm myself through mirror work.  Another is learning to meditate & tap into something bigger.

Another is learning from others & expanding self-awareness.  Another is praising, admiring, and appreciating that which you want to attain–I am always amazed at how those who’ve attained it will offer guidance.

Another practice is exercising or moving the body; dancing can be a fun way to do this.  Another is laughing at the ridiculousness of so much of my seriousness–or finding other things to laugh at.

I’m sure there are more practices that lead to happiness that I’ve not yet discovered, but I know if I turn inward for guidance, the guidance will lead me to greater discoveries.

Hope this blog helps at least one person.

Much love,

Pam Garcy, PhD