Wednesday, October 14th, 2009
Hi, everyone. In my work with clients, I usually sit down with them in my private and comfy office (which I love). I’ve decorated the walls with little ceramic signs that say things like, “Love,” “Laugh,” “Learn,” and “Follow Your Heart.” There’s homey furniture and pretty coasters, that my clients use for their mugs of tea or coffee, or sometimes for their gatorade. My hope is that the cozy and loving atmosphere will empower my clients to feel at home and to begin to open up to me. My hope is that they will know that they are safe to share what blocks them inside, and they are safe to dream beyond those blocks.
We sit and I take a deep breath, settle back in my chair, absorb myself in my client’s eyes and voice, and simply focus my energy upon the person in front of me. I want to truly listen to what my client is telling me. My goal is to listen carefully and really hear what the client is telling me. In the process of the person talking, he or she often begins to relax, unwind, and unfold. It is in that relaxation that the individual can truly open up to me about what is troubling him or her. And, it is in that relaxed and concentrated space that I can begin to offer questions to my client, and that i can help him or her to tap into inner guidance.
As much as I love and enjoy using and teaching REBT to my clients and inner guidance methods, what I love most is when my clients begin to use what they learn on themselves. I have noticed that over time, many of my clients begin to “self-correct” or “self-heal” right before my eyes. There are times when I am getting ready to ask a thoughtful question which will lead them to develop a more helpful understanding, or even a new philosophical stance. It is great fun to be surprised when a wonderful new idea emerges from my client’s mouth without my question ever leaving my lips. And–this is a key point–it is always much better than anything I would have imagined for them.
Part of what makes this aspect of the process fun for me is that I realize that my client is growing in the trust of his or her self-direction, becoming aware of the inner resources that are waiting to be harnessed.
I am grateful to my clients for reminding me that inner guidance is alive and well in each of us.