|
|
Here’s a list that I received from Kristi.
Dear Pam,
My 10 best qualities are:
1. honesty
2. love
3. being good at handicraft
4. caring
5. cleaning things up after myself
6. reliability
7. being smart
8. creativity
9. flexibility
10. beauty
Best wishes,
and Thank You for this exercise 
Kristi
How about you? What are your 10 best qualities? Take a moment in your day–give yourself the time and space to reflect upon what is best about you. Then share it so that others can recognize more about what is best in them!
Dr. Pam
Do you want to have a weekend of total self-expansion? You’ve got to go here, then: http://www.chooseyourfocus.biz
Posted in Default | No Comments »
Dear Friends,
I recently sent a holiday note to my e-mailing list. I asked that people take a moment out to appreciate their uniqueness and to become aware of the good within themselves. In addition, I asked that folks share 10 of their best qualities so that we could read and study them.
Have you ever noticed that when someone else notices what is good in themselves, it is easier for you to begin to notice what is good in you? What another notices becomes noticeable to the self. I think this is why it is inspiring for us to watch others follow their hearts and go for their dreams–we want the same for ourselves & the determination and stamina of others is hugely motivating!
Another feature of this is that as we become more aware of the good within ourselves and others, and as we appreciate this goodness more, i t e x p a n d s, becoming larger than it once was. If we take the time to remind ourselves about the good within, it usually becomes the fertile ground where our connection to our own inner guidance can grow!
I am so grateful that many of you were willing to share your lists with me so that I could share them with others. Studying this can only benefit us all.
If you happen to want to share your 10 best qualities as well, please e-mail them to me as soon as you can or comment on this blog!
Here are 2 that are quite beautiful:
Hello Pam,
Thank you for your holiday e-mail. This evening I was feeling more than a little dissappointed in myself when suddenly I knew there was some message for me in my e-mail.
There you were - and yes, I did need to remember your six facts! The one that specially struck a chord with me was ‘You will always be there for yourself’. Just at the moment I still do not know why it resonates with me at this time, but it does, so I am just feeling grateful for that at the moment.
Here’s my list of 10 things that I really love about me..
1) I’m super smart (no, really!). My brain makes things work for me.
2) I never give up.
3) I make friends easily.
4) I’m on the ‘good’ side of the equation.
5) I can trust myself more than anyone else.
6) I am on my path.
7) I love my sense of humour.
8) I know I can achieve anything I want to.
9) I trust my judgement.
10) Animals and children like to be with me.
Have a wonderful holiday period Pam, you have changed my life.
Your smug friend,
Ian
And another, from my precious mastermind sister, Crystal Star:
The Top 10 Most Fabulous Things About ME!
1. I love
2. I am compassionate
3. I am a great friend
4. I cherish those that are in my life
5. I’m a wonderful Mama
6. I smile & laugh often
7. I believe in myself and others
8. I listen to my inner guidance
9. I treasure myself
10. I am blessed to have Dr. Pamie as my dearest friend. Thank you for the
treasure that you are Pamie.
(Crystal may not realize it, but I’m the one whose blessed to have HER as a friend. If you need a sweet ear and spiritually centered lifecoach, check her out at http://www.Crystalsilverstar.com)
Thanks for reading & sharing!
–Dr. Pam
P.S. Oh, by the way, in the note that I sent, in the e-mail that went out, I mentioned 6 facts–these are what Ian referenced above (he really is smart, isn’t he?):
> Fact #1: You will always be there for yourself.
> Fact #2: There is only one person who is exactly like you, Ian.
> Fact #3: You bring something to this world that only you can bring, even if you haven’t discovered what that is yet.
> Fact #4: You can become your own best friend.
> Fact #5: You can learn to be kinder to yourself.
> Fact #6: All of the above will serve you and others.
PPS–If you want to learn, grow, connect with others and learn to choose your focus check this out: http://www.chooseyourfocus.biz
If you’ve read this far, go ahead & share–what are your 10 best qualities?
Posted in Default | No Comments »
Here’s a link to an interview that I had with the great Eddie Miller of Ultimatehealthliving.com. Eddie does a lot of great things to help people to become more successful.
Hope you enjoy this!
http://www.ultimatehealthliving.com/Dr.%20Pam%20Garcy%20-%20Power%20of%20Inner%20Guidance.mp3
Dr. Pam
Posted in Default | No Comments »
Hi you guys. It is time to talk turkey. Here’s the deal: When we overspend, we compromise our emotional well being. Indebtedness has been correlated with an increased risk of suicide and decreased mental wellbeing. It isn’t good for us and not only that, it can create mega-problems.
During the holidays, some of us tend to spend beyond our means. This can be stressful to you emotionally and damaging to your wallet, even beyond the holidays.
In addition, if you routinely compromise your psychological wellbeing through overspending, you may find it harder to tap into your inner guidance for wisdom and clarity. When you want to turn toward your inner guidance, it is beneficial to be mentally well so that you can enter a space of quiet stillness within yourself. Tuning into yourself is best done in a relaxed and peaceful mental state. How easy is it to be peaceful when you’ve just spent beyond your means?
So, what can be done? You may be thinking about the recession and you may be thinking about the ritual of spending that accompanies this time of year. There may be an internal conflict within you due to the time of year and the times themselves.
One position to consider is this: there can be a balance between spending and spending too much.
When you are overspending, do you notice how you begin to feel? Often, there is some difficulty with this if you are caught up in the rush of the moment. But, if you are not one to get caught up in this way, you might notice an anxious or tight feeling.
If this is the case, can you relax for a moment, take some slow breaths and ask yourself whether the item you are about to purchase is really so important? Have you managed just fine without it? If it isn’t so crucial, can you ask yourself what ”need” you believe the item is fulfilling? Is it really a “need” or simply a “want”? Can this “want” be fulfilled in another manner? You can use your inner guidance to help you to answer these questions.
When you are true to yourself and honor your inclinations, you may begin to see that the healthiest action is usually the wealthinest action. Pretty cool how inner guidance works, huh?
Wishing you a great holiday!
Warmly,
Dr. Pam
P.S. If you are looking for a good investment for the year to come, consider investing in yourself. Your education and training determine your skill set. Greater skills add value to your ability to sustain the market’s fluctuations. If your skills are more valuable, you can earn more. Related to this, self-programming is one of the ways that you can lead yourself to have successful outcomes. If you would like a great workshop on this topic in April 2008, you really need to check this out–http://www.chooseyourfocus.biz
Posted in Default | No Comments »
Hi, all. I am very blessed to have some very talented and insightful people reviewing my book. This is a recent review that was posted by Jenny Manion. It was interesting to hear her take on it.
Here’s the link to her review:
http://jennymannion.com/healpain/2008/11/a-book-review-of-dr-pam-garcy-an-interview-to-get-to-know-me/
Here’s an exerpt. If you go directly to her review, you can read more and add your comments and thoughts to the already active discussion! Book Review of Dr. Pam Garcy excerpt from Jenny Mannion’s review
I was fortunate enough to receive an autographed copy of Dr. Garcy’s book The Power of Inner Guidance: Seven Steps to Tune In and Turn On. She is a clinical psychologist and lectures around the Dallas area on success, motherhood, living through love and guidance and much more. Dr. Garcy is a very inspirational woman and I am pleased to present her book to you…(she) outlines a simple yet effective way to get in touch with your inner guidance. Dr. Garcy credits Dr. Albert Ellis for creating Rational Emotive Behavioral Therapy (REBT). Applying REBT to her own life enabled her to come up with a 7 step system that she also uses for her clients. Dr. Garcy has also worked with and learned from Jack Canfield (creator of The Chicken Soup for the Soul series) who she is pictured with here as well as many other notable coaches.
Dr. Garcy begins the book with a fictional scenario of two brothers. You instantly RELATE to the story and the metaphor she paints with them draws you right in. As a mother of three and a clinical psychologist she understands the time restraints and blocks that can come up which are “difficult” to remove. From Chapter Two:
“Almost always, you’ll face balancing acts that will challenge your progress. These will involve various forms of sacrifice (time, effort, energy, and money). In almost every case of triumph, a tale of perseverance and frustration precedes the success story. Once you accept that there is a price to pay for results, and that things frequently don’t happen exactly as you desire, you will be able to enter into your life’s purpose (which you’ll select and create) with your eyes open and your heart encouraged.”
Dr. Garcy defines the “inner guide” as “the still, small voice within that coaxes us to approach or avoid, depending upon what is in our best interests”. She recognizes that people have many different beliefs as to who or what that inner voice is be it a higher power, intuition, guidance or many other alternatives. Dr. Garcy makes this book applicable to all by not defining WHAT the source is but leaving up to our own personal definition. She describes her idea of SMART Inner Guidance and then explains how to tune in and use it by utilizing her seven step plan.
Dr. Garcy incorporates her many years of clinical practice and learning from many different schools of thought to teach the reader how to use a multipurpose plan of action to greatly improve the chances of success personally and professionally. She begins with her Triad of Acceptance which I think is brilliant. Acceptance is threefold — acceptance of yourself, others and life as you know it. I love her following words from this chapter:
“Obviously, in an extremely poor situation, it can be challenging to accept what is. Remember, however, acceptance is different from resignation. Acceptance is the starting point for freeing yourself to determine what you want to do or think about next. Situations may be very bad, and people may act very badly, but nonacceptance leads you down a nonproductive road of blaming, complaining and shutting down. Would you rather shut down, or acknowledge what it is and then rise to the challenge?”
Dr. Garcy gives practical steps at the end of each chapter to strengthen the point you have just read about. She guides you through setting up your space internal and external for maximum growth and for receiving your inner guidance. The stories she uses as examples all give a clear vision and you want to keep reading to find out what the next step is.
I was tempted to fly through Dr. Garcy’s book as it is easy to read and less than a hundred pages. I was very happy I took my time with it and thought about her questions and implemented her ideas into my life. Some were similar to my own “Paging Me System” but others I had never thought about before. The book ends with part two of the story of the two brothers and comes full circle. Dr. Garcy has written a very good book on how to tune in and turn on your inner guidance system. Thank you Pam for sharing this with me so I could share it with my readers. I hope you go visit http://www.myinnerguide.com to learn more about her and if you are in the Dallas area look up her lecturing and event schedule. I recommend The Power of Inner Guidance and would love to hear your thoughts on this book.
Hope you enjoyed Jenny’s review & that you’ll add your comments.
Pam Garcy, PhD
Do you want to sign up for a great workshop in April? Check out: http://www.chooseyourfocus.biz
Posted in Default | No Comments »
The impaired global economy and the economic recession are in the news and in the minds of many.
As a psychologist, I’m one who tends to carry this around & ponder its impact on the individual. How do these hard times affect us as humans? Are there ways to remain abundance-focused, even when the external world is giving us signals to do otherwise? Does becoming abundant-focused amount to denial or increased awareness? Could it be the best course of action, both for the individual and for society, to remain focused upon the abundance that already exists? How is it that some people are so affected by what goes on in the news, and others can go through life unaffected? How is it that some people are able to prosper more in economic hard times?
As I’ve considered these questions, I’ve decided that I would challenge myself to learn to retain and even enhance my own abundance-consciousness. I suppose this is coming from a growing wonder in my mind about what we’re each capable of manifesting. When my book hit #1 national bestseller, which I knew would take a miracle, my perspective shifted. It gave me pause to consider the power of creation we each have. So, I started to shift into thinking that perhaps, even in the midst of the news of external problems, we could each continue to learn, grow, contribute and thrive–if that was the intention.
As a part of this growth, I recently noticed myself finding more ways to nurture myself. I have increased my meditation to include different formats and have opened my awareness as a result.
I know that health as a woman depends upon self-pampering and nurturing the self–not just others (which moms like me tend to do too much). Today, for example, I decided to pamper myself by doing something I’d always wanted to do for myself–I went and got my wavy hair straightened at a nice salon near my home. I chatted with the hair-dresser, continuing my thinking about the matter of the recession on individual mentality.
“Have you guys noticed the impact of the recession in your business?” I asked curiously.
“Well, our hair colorists have had less profits this year, but our hair stylists are at the same profit level,” he replied, “which really isn’t good because usually we need to improve about 10% a year in order to keep up with price increases in the products. So, yes, there are some signs of it in our business.”
“Have you had layoffs as a result?”
“Not really any substantial changes at this point in that area, but it affects us all.”
I shared that I have a friend, Ellen, who made a pretty profound comment in our recent training teleseminar. She said, “There’s just as much money out there as there always has been. It is important that we remember that. It is still out there and it is still available that people can succeed in hard times.”
I consider what is going on in the economy and I return to the innate capacity that we possess to turn inward for answers. We can do this so easily when things are going well. How is it that we sometimes forget to do this when things are uncertain and not going as well as we’d hoped? At those times we look around, read the upsetting news, listen to it again on the radio, watch it again on the tv and buy into it without question. We stop asking ourselves the questions about the information & the how much of the truth it represents.
I think we turn outward for certainty when we are fearful & get forgetful of our internal power as we adopt an external approach to life. An example of this is a friend who became a compulsive neat freak after her father abandoned her and her mom. Somehow, keeping everything tidy was a way to prove to herself that life was okay. Her outer world was okay, so therefore she concluded that everything was okay. How many of us are adopting this childlike approach in our adult lives? Can an immature externalized approach solve the mature internal questions we have about uncertainty?
It is normal for us to have a strong desire for order and certainty, but it is not healthy for us to allow this desire to become a demand, or to resort to externalized pretend-coping responses over the long term. Once we say that we must have order and certainty, we begin to feel depressed and panicky when these are not forthcoming. These unhappy feelings can lead to maladaptive behaviors to get rid of the pain. So, we make ourselves mentally unhealthy by demanding that things must be a certain way.
We can also help ourselves toward mental health by recognizing that we can strongly prefer for things to be a certain way, and we can cope with them being yet another way than our first choice.
When it comes to the recession, we can even learn to discover that what is being understood by us in our fear isn’t the whole truth. It is part of the truth. When we are thinking that things are bleak and grim, this is only a part of the truth–where there is darkness on one side of the world, there is light on the other. So, it is natural for problems to have benefits on their other side.
Even now, I suspect that there is more to the recession story than meets the eye. There are folks who are making money off of the recession–folks who are capitalizing on the business opportunities it presents–yes economic opportunities exist, believe it or not. There are also personal improvement opportunities. There are other folks who are using this time to rediscover things about themselves that they didn’t know. Some are using it to grow and learn about self-mastery, despite the fact that everyone outside of them is showing them reasons that they can feel stressed out.
The folks who are benefitting are the ones who know how to turn inward for clarity and for answers, how to live with intention and how to retain their sense of human integrity despite emotional shifts. These are key tools–at this point, I still believe Inner Guidance is the most cruicial of them all–because it leads to them all.
Here are the questions I’d suggest you begin to ask yourself to harness your inner guidance, especially if you are facing job loss or excessive strain due to the recession:
- What is there to learn during this time?
- What can I do to grow during this time?
- How can I benefit from this time?
- Who do I know who can help?
Please comment on this blog if you have a moment.
Thanks for reading,
Dr. Pam
P.S.–You know the training teleseminar I mentioned before? Well, Ellen and I are doing 3 more of these before our big workshop in April. So, you actually ought to go sign up for the details now while there’s still room: http://www.myinsourcing.com/PamGarcyWorkshop.htm
Posted in Default | 2 Comments »
Recently, I was asked how I help people to decide whether or not to return to an old flame. Of course, I believe that your answers are often within you already. If you become still and quiet, you can learn to experience these answers using the methods described in my book, The Power of Inner Guidance: Seven Steps to Tune In and Turn On.
If you are someone who turns in regularly, you will learn about yourself and you will learn to receive the answers within. Sometimes, these are the answers of healing, the answers which tell you to take time out for yourself and feel your feelings. Other times, these are the answers of reaching and growth, answers which direct you to search and to move into the beyond.
So, I would like to encourage you to take that time to find your own answer.
When your heart is unresolved about a relationship of the past, you can also ask some additional questions. First, you might want to remember why you got together initially, how the relationship ended and why you broke up. In that context, you’ll be in a position to evaluate your decision more thoughtfully. Once you’ve recalled the facts, it is often helpful to ask yourself these two questions:
(1) Has the other person made a substantial change? or
(2) Have I changed my expectations?
If either of these has changed, then there is a possibility that new patterns can be developed–patterns that will bring you closer together rather than pushing you apart once more.
If nothing has changed, then you might want to consider why you are deciding to repeat an old pattern. Are you running for safety in order to avoid the work of true growth? It is very important to be honest with yourself during the decision making, especially if the prior relationship was unhealthy.
Sometimes, it is also helpful to turn to professional help. Individual therapy can help you to understand yourself more fully as you make your decision and learn to move forward.
Pam Garcy, PhD
Learn to experience abundance in all life areas–even though everyone is telling you that now is not the time. Check out http://www.myinsourcing.com/PamGarcyWorkshop.htm
Posted in Default | No Comments »
Are any of you juggling the roles of spouse, professional and parent? Isn’t it a wonderful challenge and learning experience? I know that it has been a real education for me! Anyway, I offered a few tips on the matter to an author who writes articles for women in business, Aliza Pilar Sherman and she put together a really useful piece. The link to her piece is below & so is a copy of the article.
On a related matter, you might be interested in learning how to Recession Proof Your Mind. If this is the case, you’ll want to check out a workshop that I’m co-hosting in April at http://www.myinsourcing.com/RecessionProofYourMind.htm
http://www.sbresources.com/SBR_template.cfm?Document=sherman.cfm
The Pain of Role Strain
–by Aliza Pilar Sherman
Aliza Pilar Sherman is a Web pioneer, marketing and business expert specializing in women’s business issues and author of PowerTools for Women in Business: 10 Ways to Succeed in Life and Work.“
|
|
| While every entrepreneur tends to wear multiple hats, female entrepreneurs often juggle as many - if not more roles - in their personal and professional lives. This approach to getting things done, whether out of habit or necessity, can cause “role strain,” that is, undue stress and conflict.
As a founder and CEO of Health InfoTechnics (HIT), LeeAnne Denney is an example of an entrepreneur who is also a part of the “Sandwich Generation.” She and her husband not only care for their two children, ages 12 and 8, but also are the caregivers for LeeAnne’s mother and her husband’s mother, who live together in a house nearby. Denney considers herself a mentor, strategist and developer at her company as well as an “air traffic controller” at work and at home.
“I hired a great assistant this year to help me keep track of everything,” says Denney. “I am also learning to delegate and mentor the staff around me. I am beginning to turn over more and higher levels of responsibilities to others and to focus on tutoring them.”
Denney says she constantly re-evaluates whether or not something is working. “If it is not working, I trust my instincts and am prepared to find something else that will work and to make the changes necessary.”
Kirsten Mohan not only owns her own successful real estate business but pulls double-duty as marketing director for her husband’s photography business not to mention being mom to two boys, ages 1 and 3. And she teaches classes in her community.
“I’m constantly juggling everyone’s demands on my time and working to find the balance needed to get it all done without losing it,” says Mohan. “Somehow we’ve managed to make it this far, and we’ve got what’s shaping up to be an even better year this year, despite the economic trouble on the horizon. To make all of that work, I have to work very hard to keep my energy and focus up as much as possible to achieve short and long-term goals for both businesses.”
Mohan admits time is her biggest challenge - trying to prioritize everyone’s needs and squeeze enough time out of each day. With more to do each day than she can actually accomplish, Mohan says she has to be “ruthless with priorities.”
Says Mohan, “I sit down each day in the morning to evaluate my goals and plan for the day. I make a list of what I need to accomplish to feel like I’ve ‘won,’ then set out to do just that. At the end of the day, I try to sit down and review what I’ve done and strategize for the days and weeks ahead. If something didn’t work about that day, my husband and I often sit down after the kids go to bed and brainstorm solutions.”
“To pursue desired larger goals, it is helpful to have a clear vision of a greater goal that you are pursuing,” offers Pamela Garcy, Ph.D., clinical psychologist and author of “The Power of Inner Guidance: Seven Steps to Tune In and Turn On,” who gives these tips for women who are plagued by role strain.
1. Imagine yourself working on your goal. Get clear on the smaller steps and schedule these steps into your planner.
2. Reward yourself at various milestones along the way to the goal. (Most people forget to do this part!)
3. Hire a coach or find an accountability partner. Touch base with this person weekly.
Garcy also emphasizes the importance of women taking care of themselves both physically and emotionally to maintain their stamina and suggests:
1. Remember to drink water, eat healthy food, exercise, talk or write about problems, sleep enough and take time out to relax. If you operate in “fight or flight” mode all the time, you will find yourself burning out.
2. Allow yourself to take vacations and time off. You might think that the world will fall apart without you, but would you allow your car to go years without a tune-up?
3. Treat yourself with the same respect that you treat others. If you set healthy boundaries for yourself, you will increase the odds of longevity!
4. Take time to tune-in to yourself and ask yourself questions such as, “What do I want?” and “What can I do to help myself right now?”
While Denney does get a massage every other week for her “me” time, she points to her support network as critical including her mother, her husband and her staff.
Mohan follows this formula:
- Spend time around positive, successful people.
- Help other people achieve success.
- Take time out for myself.
- Coffee. Lots of coffee.
Mohan also points to her husband as her key supporter. “We make it all work because we’re a team. I help his business, and he helps mine. The end result is something better than either of us could achieve alone. We keep each other sane, we support each other’s dreams, and we share ideas and energy to constantly move the businesses forward. Collaboration is really the key to our success.”
|
|
Posted in Default | No Comments »
There are some times when it might become important to take a holiday from the holidays.
These include: after a trauma, after a painful transition, following severe emotional distress, after job loss, and after the loss of a loved one.
Some might say push-on, push-on. Indeed for some, this is a good approach. However, if your experience is recent, you might really have the urge to take time to heal and regroup.
As I’ve often said to people, honor yourself. Pay attention to your inclinations and allow yourself to be true to what is right for you. You don’t HAVE TO celebrate when you need to heal.
This is why I want to suggest that some of you take a holiday from the holidays. Take the time to feel your feelings, get support and heal. You don’t have to make all the parties or buy everyone a gift when you’re not up to it. Those who truly love you will support your decision to take care of YOU!
Recently, I suggested these tips to someone who asked me how to survive the loss of a loved one over the holidays:
1. Allow yourself to grieve the loss of your loved one. This takes priority over any holiday.
2. Let yourself off the hook. You might not be in the mood to celebrate. This is normal. Honor yourself by allowing yourself to take a break from all of the parties.
3. Seek support from those who understand you. Turn to others who love you and want you to do what is best for you, especially those who can give you a hug and a caring ear.
Hope you are all doing well & have a safe and restful December.
Pam Garcy, PhD
Want to Recession Proof Your Mind this April? Check out this workshop now:
Posted in Default | No Comments »
|
|
|
|
|
